Sunday, March 20, 2011

A wedding, China-style

What a day and what experiences we’ve had! We were fortunate enough to be invited to a Chinese wedding. I will provide more details in a bit, but it was a fascinating look into Chinese culture and further proved to me how different our cultures can be at times. The West has definitely influenced the East and we saw numerous examples of it today. (In China, white is the color for death; in the past, brides used to wear red, not white, but that's not often the case nowadays. The bride today wore a western-style bridal gown.)


Our adventure started, like it often does, with a cab ride. Fortunately, we were able to catch a taxi and we showed the directions that our friend had texted us to the driver. When we arrived, we were a bit confused because our friends weren’t there yet and there were two wedding parties hosting events at the same establishment. One group had two people dressed up in Mickey Mouse costumes. After almost walking into the wrong wedding, a Chinese woman ran up to us and directed us to the correct one. We politely informed her that we were waiting for our friends, and found an out-of-the-way spot to stand until they arrived.


With our friends in tow, we greeted the bride and groom (who were standing outside of the restaurant). I had a red envelope filled with a hundred kuai that I gave to the bride (maybe I should have given it to the groom, but I didn’t know what was proper) with both hands (that’s the polite way to hand items to people in China). It was our unofficial ticket into the event. We took an elevator to the ninth floor. When we arrived, we signed a red guest book, walked down a beautifully covered (if a bit flimsy under our Western-sized bodies) yellow walkway to our seats. It took a while before the event started, so we talked with our friends for a bit. 


There was an official announcer who started off the ceremony by telling some jokes to get the crowd warmed-up. He even gave us a special greeting. (I’m telling you, the Chinese win the “best host ever” prize.) We didn’t know what he was saying and we were sitting down when he introduced us. By the time we figured out what was happening, the moment for us to stand up had passed.


After a few minutes, some loud music started (every ceremony in China has the amplification up to eleven and the treble pumped up at full volume). The groom started down the yellow walkway singing a karaoke song to his bride. The woman, who was was standing inside a pink tent, responded to her beloved in song. When the man arrived at the tent they did something meaningful that we couldn’t see (our view was blocked by a number of people observing the “ceremony”). Then the couple began walking back down the “aisle” (remember, this event is held in a large room in a restaurant) to a spot-lit stage where the professional host said some words about the couple. 


At one point, the host grabbed a bouquet and stood in front of the couple (like in western weddings) and had them repeat some silly vows (I promise to always wash your feet, always cook you dinner, etc.). Following this hilarious exchange, a young woman brought the rings and the couple placed them on one another’s fingers during a song and narration. They did some extremely deep bows at the audience, they emptied a bottle of wine into a special glass holder that looked a bit like a fancy silver hamster run, the couple downed a glass of wine while their right arms were entwined, they hugged (no kisses at this wedding!), and a number of people toasted. During most of the event, people in the audience were busy eating and talking in the dark. (Let me tell you that it’s dangerous to eat at a Chinese banquet if you can’t see what you’re ingesting. Jean-Jacques accidentally grabbed and munched down part of a turtle's head.)


In the middle of the wedding ceremony, a boy’s shirt caught on fire because his sleeve had come into contact with an open flame on the table. (Eating can be a dangerous business here.) Fortunately he was unhurt, but quite a bit of angry shouting transpired between the parents and waitstaff (the boy’s family was deriding the waitress). 


New items added tonight to the Exotic Eats List? Pig’s ear and sea cucumber. The former was surprisingly tasty, but I thoroughly disliked the latter because of my personal issues with food that has a squishy texture.


When we finished the meal, and toasting, we left the wedding. During the dinner (eventually the lights were turned on again), we were given party favors. We didn’t open them until we arrived home (it’s considered rude to open a gift in front of the giver) and discovered that the little boxes contained various types of little candies. 


I did feel bad for the bride and groom because they didn’t have the opportunity to eat much; instead, they went from table to table toasting their guests. (Again, I note the incredible hospitality that is part of the Chinese culture.) Not only did the couple have to stand outside in the rainy cold weather greeting guests for about a half and hour or forty-five minutes, but they also were so busy  talking with everyone that they didn’t have time for food. 


Sadly, the couple will be at work tomorrow and they won’t be taking a honeymoon.

4 comments:

  1. Propriety kept you from taking pictures, right? Too bad, the event sounded picturesque. As for the turtle head, I would have given anything to see Jean-Jacques' face.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, I didn't want to be rude and haul my gigantic camera around. We get stared at enough as it is and it only gets worse when I drag out my big camera.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Interesting, and -- even it it's impolite to laugh in print -- hilarious. Often, when reading about foreign weddings (as in National Geogrphic, for example) I think other countries out-do us in terms of hoopla and significance surrounding marriage. But this feels just the opposite; not quite enough depth to the experience for my taste.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Grandma, we also felt that way, but it was interesting to observe the ceremony. We're happy to add it to our list of fascinating experiences.

    ReplyDelete